It’s 99.99999999% sure that I’m going to Michigan State University in the fall to get an MA in Teaching English as a Second Language.
I’m really scared, though. Living in China has become a big part of my identity. What’ll it be like to lose that, at least temporarily? Also, my life is really comfortable here, I have lots of freinds, I get respect from people around me (mostly), etc. But the thing is, I’ve been here for eight years. I just really need a new challenge. I need something more in my life, which, despite all the good things I have going, can feel kind of flat. I’ve gone as far in my present job as I can right now, too. I’d feel sort of stagnant if I stayed here, and I think I’d start getting really frustrated.
As for why I chose Michigan, at first I looked for programs that seemed appealing to me, especially those that seemed more practical than theoretical. Then I tried to figure out the school’s reputation, and whether I could get some form of assistantship or other financial aid. In the end, I applied to Indiana, Michigan State, U. of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, and Arizona State U. So far, I’ve heard back, and been accepted by every school but IU. Illinois and Michigan both offered me assistantships, so I tried to decide between them. Teya lived near MSU and knew people who went there, and told me her friends were happy with the program and were glad they’d gone there. The people from the program also seemed really personable and helpful when I had problems with my GRE scores and stuff. Meanwhile, I have another friend at U. of Illinois right now who doesn’t seem to be enjoying himself very much. He’s found some of the teachers not very approachable, and it seems like for him, the program is something for him to get through so he can get the degree paper. He’s a pretty easygoing guy (or he was when I knew him better), so his having criticisms carries a lot of weight with me. I’m a worrywort, and will probably want to ask my professors a lot of questions about writing papers and stuff, so it is important to me that they be welcoming and helpful. Plus, comparing the stipends (not that that is the most important thing), the Michigan one was higher, and I think pretty generous. So, in the end, I’ve decided to go with Michigan.
Some people ask me, “Why are you studying teaching English? You speak Chinese well, so why don’t you major in that, or get some sort of Chinese studies (like Chinese culture or politics) degree?” Well, the answer is that I really do like teaching English. If I focused completely on Chinese, I don’t know what I would do with it. I don’t want to work in business. I also don’t know about going into academia, and by that I mean PhD level academia with lots of research. From what I saw at Indiana, I don’t know if I’m mean enough for that. It seems like “hard” academia can be a pretty nasty field. With Chinese studies, I don’t know … would I work in politics? But then, I’d have to work for a politician whose views I’d agree with, or it would be a big problem for me. I mean, I generally support Obama, but I don’t think he knows what he’s talking about when it comes to China. Or I could work for a think tank … but I don’t know how you would get that kind of job.
But anyway, it seems that I’ll be studying teaching English, at least for a while, and we’ll see where things go after that. I never thought I would end up teaching English in China, so maybe I’ll end up doing something unexpected again.