mf.rox

Here is a headline from the online edition:

Outlook bleak for weekend

Sounds like we shouldn’t even get out of bed.

Actually, though, it’s not about our social lives.  It’s about the weather.

And he wants everyone to know it!

At least that’s what other NASCAR drivers told driver Jon Denning, who is Jewish.

More here.

Originally found on Yo! Yenta!

I just heard on CCTV-9 that about 2,000,000 are stranded at railway stations around the country!  The gov’t is trying to hand out instant noodles and bottled water to people who are stuck, while meanwhile urging migrant workers to stay where they are and not try to go home.  A friend of mine, Karen, told me today that train ticket sales have been suspended in Shanghai because there is so much snow in the provinces peoplel want to go to that it’s impossible to get anywhere.  A few trains that tried to make it broke down, because they were electrical.  Other trains, like gas or coal fueled, had to come get them.

I just started thinking this, and now I can’t get it out of my head.  It’s strange — I’ve never been to Oolitic, which is a little town in Southern Indiana.

There was just an interview on TV with a security guard at Guangzhou Railway Station, and I think it was the same woman I just mentioned, the one who helped me find my train once!

Go Chen Shu Fen!  Thanks!

There’s a Chinese idiom to describe this: people mountain, people sea.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/katherinelo/2224945375/
(by Katherinelo)

http://www.flickr.com/photos/sewage/2226102914/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/sewage/2226179422/
(by Sewage)

The other day I was thinking about starting my own money-making religion. I could call it Scienceology. I could swipe all this Scientology stuff, change a few things here and there, and then offer people Scientology-type courses, but at 20% off. Then, from time to time, I’d have sales! It’d be like, “Advance one level, 50% off!” (Of course, it I wanted it to appeal to Chinese people, I’d have to swap the aliens for something like dinosaurs, because Chinese people think alien kind of stuff is dumb.)

But my fiendish plan has been quashed. Some guys have been posting Church of Scientology materials online, so people can read their stupid crap for free!

Naughty “Anonymous”!

Which is more than the population of many US cities!

Over half million expected stranded at China station.

The first time I was there I got totally lost, because it’s huge and confusing, plus most people around are speaking Cantonese.  A nice lady security guard actually took me by the arm and escorted me to my train.

I was going to post something about it being my birthday, but of course my parents called and now it’s past twelve!

It continues to snow like mad here.  Usually, it doesn’t at all, but we’ve had a ton, even with some accumulation.  It’s more comfortable to be outside now; it’s cold enough that the water in the air has turned to snow, so it’s drier.  I actually walked from the Zhongshan Park Carrefour to my house rather than be squished on the crowded bus.  It was really nice.

I hadn’t thought I would do anything special tonight, because the weather was so bad I couldn’t ask people to come out (I’d thought the slushy roads might be dangerous).  But instead, J and Curtis and Peggy called me and asked me out for Cantonese food.  Matt M. came too and gave me a dandy Mao Zedong pen holder.

A good birthday!

Proctor: What do you believe is the current state of our country?
Pageant contestant: Wisconsin. Wait… Can I change my answer?

Beauty pageant
Green Bay, Wisconsin

(From www.overheardeverywhere.com)

Female announcer: You know, I have to admit that until today I thought Heath Ledger and Ben Affleck were the same person.  They just look the same.  Maybe I shouldn’t say this, but all foreigners look the same to me.

Male announcer:  Oh, really?  You know, some foreigners say Chinese people all look alike.

Female announcer, laughing:  That’s crazy!

This love story attracted a lot of attention when it was written about in a women’s journal last year. The man, Mr. Liu, died recently at seventy years of age.

Liu Guojiang and Xu Chaoqing’s story

Old lady: My grandson Brad and his Jewish wife had a baby.
Old man: That’s very nice. And they’re all doing well?
Old lady: I guess.
Old man: What is the baby’s name?
Old lady: I don’t know. Some long Jewish name.
Teenager: They named her ‘Amy,’ Grandma. Her name is Amy.

–M42 bus

(From OverheardinNewYork.)

Dude: I don’t know. I just feel like her face is going out of style, you know what I mean?

–27th & 7th

(From OverheardinNewYork )

Another article I like (but didn’t write), from Shangzilla.

“Tom Cruise English” to go on sale Thursday

(Actually, Matt got rid of the Thursday in the headline when he put it up.  I do like the addition of the photo to the side.)

She’s travelling in Xishangbanna, where I went a couple of years ago.

I didn’t have any such luck, although a cute monkey did stick its finger up my nose.

I heard about this from Matt of Shanghzilla. I live between Has Adjoining Jar and Knight Z Harpoons Satan. I am disturbingly close to Rough Anus on a Lad.

Anagrammed map

(From ExploreShanghai.)

The worst English book ever.

Originally uploaded by MFinChina

This guy can’t write decent English, and yet he wrote an English book! I found this at a store next to my university gate. I couldn’t believe it was real!